Wednesday, January 9, 2013

A Pastor Molested Me

The young man made contact again recently. This time his words literally ate me out and caused some tears to run down my eyes and I got an instant head ache.

He said, "Brother Khrystus, doesn't my story matter? Why haven't you shared it after all these months since we first spoke? Doesn't my story matter? You are writing about everything else. Nobody really cares for real boy. Nobody!" That was it, he didn't wait for me to respond and I haven't felt so badly in a long time with regards to one of my clients.

You see friend, months ago, a male client who receives these very same blog postings that you are reading now, shared with me his story of being molested by a pastor and asked me to share it to help others around the world know that they are not alone and to help warn parents about the many reputable predators out there waiting to take their children and teens as prey after giving them special gifts, special treatment and special company.

Some client stories I forget about because I talk with so many folks around the world. Others get etched in a special place in my heart never to be forgotten. When ever I think about them, I remember the one on one session, or telephone call, or Blackberry chat, WhatsApp Chat, Facebook Convo, Linked-In Chat, My Space Connection, Ovoo Talk, MSN Chat etc just like we spoke yesterday."

Here goes. My friend, I humbly apologize for not sharing. Some stories I write and don't have to think about, so I just flow. Since you asked me to keep sharing your story, build a website to reach out to others around the world so they can share their stories but not use your name, I had to think through for months and ascertain the appropriate time to share and carefully decide how best to approach this. Since it must be burning you and the hurt must be growing greater, I won't wait to launch the STOP  THE  RAPE  - STOP  THE  MOLESTATION  CAMPAIGN in this our 5th  anniversary year - I will preamble it with your story NOW.  I had no choice but to stop what I was doing and write now.

"Brother Khrystus," he paused for a long while then continued. "I have something to tell you and I want you to share it with the world to help others for as long as you stay so influential. You have to promise me though, that you would NEVER use my name or tell anyone else at all. AT  ALL!"

How was I to make such a commitment I wondered to myself quickly? Did he Kill someone? If I promised to not tell, this could be obstruction of justice and I could be prosecuted. Should I tell him I can't commit to that promise? While I was thinking all soughts of things, he asked again- "You hear?"

I quickly sighed and sighed and responded, "Yes Sir. . . go on - I promise." I was really hoping that it wasn't something CRIMINAL he was involved in but I would keep my word.

"Brother Khrystus, I was molested by Pastor ___________. It still feels like a dream." The young man went into detail - every detail from beginning to end. Every gruesome - nasty detail. He said, "I'm above crying now Brother Khrystus, I walk so peacefully and reflect a happy look on the outside just to hide my pain. I try to stay patient and remain a people person because I don't want to stay away from individuals and let people see that something is wrong with me and I'm hurting.

I want you to know Brother Khrystus that the anger is built up so much within me that I am well capable of killing someone, not because I always look like everything is OK. When I lay at nights or spend time alone, the only memories I have are those that the "ANTIMAN  PASTOR" have left with me. He's a DAMN ANTIMAN and preaches and people shout AMEN."

I put my left hand on my forehead, looked down at the ground for a while and then I asked, "Have you ever told anyone about this?" He responded, "No sir, you're the only F****** person and it has to stay right here or I'll kill you. You are free to share it, preach it, talk about it, but never use my name."

I never knew this person to ever swear at all. In counseling, you are not to look surprised, you are to let your client just flow and ease themselves and express themselves anyway they like.

I looked at him straight in the eyes and asked, "Why haven't you ever told anyone until now?" I kinda predicted what he'd say but I waited for him to say it. Just as I predicted, he responded, "Number 1 - Brother Khrystus

- People revere PASTORS as perfect people with no sins and if I talk out about a Pastor, everyone would say that I'm lying and wouldn't believe me and would pity the Pastor

- Number 2 - Even if I talk out, everyone would Ridicule me and call me the antiman and very few would call the pastor antiman

- Number 3 - Some pastors have been raping girls and molesting boys for years because I know about other cases too and those that start coming into the public are quickly hushed down to save the Pastor's name and he or she just continues on like nothing.

- Number 4 - My relatives and friends revere the pastor and think that he's just being nice and kind to me and others, but never knew and I doubt they would ever believe and I don't ever intend to tell them. If they ask me, I'll just say no. If they pressure me - I'll still say no.

- Number 5 - There is no where to go and report this crime. NO WHERE.

I said, no sir, each country has a Special Victims Unit that deals with these sort of things. He quickly responded, "SPECIAL VICTIMS UNIT? SPECIAL VICTIM  UNIT? Then why is it when ever someone is raped, the whole world knows about it on their BB or on the media. The media doesn't call their names and I know of many cases that weren't public and when they were taken to the Police, they became public and everybody knew who the victim was. That would never happen to me - NEVER. I prefer to keep my business to myself."

- Number 6 - Nobody cares! Pastors know their pastor friends are doing this and instead they get together and condemn these happenings, all of ya'll keep ya'll mouths SHUT and let the sin continue and let the Pastors Pastor. Anyway, there are no true pastors around. Politicians doing crap and Pastors ain't even talking out. NOBODY CARES"  he adamantly shouted.

Friend, he was really angry. I'll be honest. He said he was capable of killing because of everything he had stored up in him and he had me a bit uneasy. Even as I write, I am being very careful not to give any clue of his name but I understood him so well.

I won't use this article to talk to parents about how to monitor their children and teens with reputable and non reputable adults. I would also not use it to talk about how people honestly see the police when they have to deal with these type of cases too. I wouldn't use it to talk about how some of YOU have Pastors higher than KING  JESUS. I wouldn't use it to talk about how VICTIMS that REPORT such heinous crimes which is the right thing to do, get bashed by society. I wouldn't use it to talk about many of my other clients around the world - male and female alike that have been raped or molested or fondled by ministers of the gospel. I won't use it to talk about how WE - AS CHRISTIANS - AS  MINISTERS  OF  THE  GOSPEL show a don't-care attitude many times and don't speak out against WRONG just to remain popular and not lose our monthly gifts of offerings and tithes.

All these are topics all by themselves that I may write on if the Lord permits and  as I work on doing a number of things in honour of this young man who contacted again to get his story shared.

What I will use the last paragraph of this article to do as a matter of URGENCY, is to BEG parents and guardians to closely monitor your children and youths with both male and female ministers. Do not revere them as GOD. When you see your child getting extra special gifts and treatment from individuals, don't take it for granted. Investigate it. Mind you, there are some very honest, helpful people, but there are many wolves in sheep clothing and wearing a MINISTER COLLAR too.

Don't you remember that David was a man after God's own heart when he sinned with BATHSHEBA and aided in executing a MURDER? Yes the David of PSALMS.

Sometimes I continue to wonder if anyone ever bothers with these articles and if I should just stop writing and go back to using my network to advertise only. A few days ago, one of my clients emailed me and inquired as to why they don't receive regular discount coupons and promotions in their email so fast anymore, because that's just how all their youths got to print shirts for less a few years ago, as they printed over 50 of them using $5 Print Coupons they got in one of my EMAIL  PROMOS. I smiled and remembered that order at so well.

Then . . .I wondered - do these Dare 2 Be Different International Articles really matter? Like the gentleman asked me - Does anyone really care? Will the police do anything to step up on their special victims unit? Will we continue to see Pastors as Gods? or look at US - YES US - more closely?

On the website that our ministry will work on in honour of this young man who bravely spoke out, Other Victims from St. Kitts - Nevis, The Caribbean and The World will be able to share their stories too and when our ministry has enough confidence in the authorities and can be assured that our legal system gets up to date so that such cases can be tried without public exposure of the victim in a private setting, then and only then we would be able to see the community and the police holding hands to fight against crime.

If you are a victim of molestation or rape by anyone, Dare 2 Be Different International is there to reach out and help. We believe, that we are the organization God has placed in the Caribbean and on earth that will help to bring back up cases that VICTIMS thought are off the books since they happened 2 years ago, 5 years ago, 10 years ago, 15 years ago and help get you JUSTICE.

It is happening in the USA - we believe that our law enforcement and legal system is just as capable too and we encourage you to start talking out and reaching out to a person of confidence and we do expect to hear our regional law enforcement TOP  OFFICIALS making regular media briefings so as to make VICTIMS comfortable that they are now up to scratch to carefully, non-publicly handle such cases.

Young man - I applaud you. I applaud you greatly. Although you didn't share your name, you have resurrected a matter that has been sleeping for years and we promise to continue to blog about it, talk on radio about it, write articles about it, until WE as pastors get our acts together and STEP  DOWN if we are guilty of such, or aim to KEEP  OUR  STANDARDS  HIGH  and try our best to do as much RIGHT as we humanly can.

If you are apart of a FLOCK around the world and you very well know that your pastor is a CHILD PREDATOR or you have been molested by him or her, but kept down and under pressure, Jesus can talk care and set you FREE - RIGHT NOW. Do not be subject anymore - begin to speak out all around the world. You are worth more than $5000 or a Blackberry or regular topups and food hampers from your pastor. Do not worry about all the fancy gifts you have received in the past - At the start of this 2013 - decide to come out from BONDAGE - SPEAK OUT  LIKE  THIS  YOUNG  MAN  AND  HELP  OTHERS.

You DO NOT  deserve to be the one that can't sleep and always stay hurting. You can change that tonight by agreeing to start talking out. Cause a Minister of the Gospel or reputable businessperson or government official not to sleep. When they text you or call you - do not answer. That is your first step of turning things around - STANDING  UP  TO  THEM  and SHOWING  THEM  THAT  YOU  ARE  NOT  AFRAID - your next step is to tell someone - YES YOU  CAN!

Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter. 
Martin Luther King, Jr. 

In Christ,

Khrystus Wallace, President and Founder
Dare 2 Be Different International

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